Attainable New Year's Resolutions

From the Good Clean Fun Archives

This year I resolve to...

- Gain weight. At least 30 pounds.

- Stop exercising. Waste of time.

- Read less. Makes you think.

- Watch more TV. I've been missing some good stuff.

- Procrastinate more. Starting tomorrow.

- Take a vacation to someplace important: like, to see the largest ball of twine.

- Stop bringing lunch from home: I should eat out more.

- Buy a 1983 Cadillac ElDorado and invest in a really loud stereo system and get the windows tinted.

- Buy some fur for the dash.

- Not swim with piranhas or sharks.

- Never make New Year's resolutions again.

Comments, suggestions, flames, etc.
tellswor@slonet.org

Use the BACK button to return.

Or go to the Good Clean Fun Main Page
(Graphics Version) or (Text-Only Version)